O Joyous Day - Yet Why Am I Crying?

Obama won.

Landslide, it would appear. Or at least very close to it.

McCain conceded with grace and dignity, and earned a modicum of my respect back. I salute the man for his service.

Yet I can't help but feel like crying. What should be a historic and momentous day of celebration is soiled by the hatred and disgust that those on the opposing side are spewing out. People saying we're all doomed, welcoming us to a Socialist nation, threatening to move.

I'm sorry. If you love America as much as many of the opposing side claim to, Democracy should NOT make you want to leave. You should not be AFRAID of letting the people speak for themselves. Perhaps you didn't win - disappointment is inevitable in these kinds of deals, but recognize what has been accomplished:

We have made progress in the seemingly eternal struggle between the races. We have broken many barriers this election season, with both African Americans and women making great strides in the political world. We have opened our hearts up, and changed many people's lives because we see the need for a new strategy in this country.

What we have now is not working. And the same old game of hate and fear did not work. But people will not let it go. People are clinging even more so to their vitriol, ignoring even their own leaders' pleas to accept Obama as their president, to lift him up in prayer even if you do not agree with all of his stands on issues. To follow the leader elect of our great nation, and help us all bridge the gap that has been bringing this country to its knees instead of keeping it high where it has once been.

I do not glorify America overmuch. But last night made me so proud of our country. Red states went blue. Some red states kind of went purple (Texas tried!), but people came together. There was no booing at Obama's victory address. There were tears, many tears. The man presented himself as someone with, as my fiance noted, the weight of the world on his shoulders. Looking into his eyes as he gave that speech, one could see how much he cares for this country.

I hold that I am a decent judge of character. At the very least, certain people rub me the wrong way. Kerry rubbed me the wrong way. Sarah Palin rubbed me the wrong way. McCain started to by the very end of things.

Looking into Obama's eyes, I almost completely give into the belief that he not only wants to change things for the better, that he really can. That not all of his campaign promises were merely platitudes to get himself elected. That he legitimately desires good for America.

You can find him flawed, most people are. You can disagree with his policies, that's what America is about. The freedom to say "I don't like that much." We speak with our votes and with our hearts here in America.

If you want to continue the discourse of hate, then please, make good on your promise to leave. We don't need that here, anymore. I am sick to death of the cries of "Terrorist!" "Socialist!" and many worse. I am shaken to the core at the fact that I could not look away during his speech last night for fear that some ignorant racist with a gun would assassinate him before he even got a chance.

What moral high ground do you really stand on when you cannot look a man in the eyes because of his ideals or his skin color? What righteous anger do you really have when you slander a man without knowing his heart? I know this plea is overly emotional, but I cannot help it. For the first time, my heart is breaking for my country.

I wanted today to be celebratory. Despite having a test I've barely studied for, I woke up today feeling that things were going to change.

Then I saw... amongst my own acquaintances, the bile spilling over into every status update, every bulletin, every newspost.

We wanted change. But you people won't budge. And my heart is breaking. You've not only crushed the American spirit, you've crushed the American dream. When America fails, it will not be Obama's fault. It will not even be Bush's fault.

If you can't find a way to cooperate with your fellow man regardless of ideology and religion, then you have broken into the halls of American History and stolen the book written on what the American dream should be. You have taken it, set it ablaze, and replaced it with the doctrine of the Ignorant American. Clinging bitterly, yes, bitterly, to your outdated hatred and refusing to look out the window to see if its raining or if the sun is shining.

Because to you, if "that one" is on your television screen, it must be raining. If a woman somewhere is having an abortion, it must be raining. If a gay couple somewhere is holding hands, it must be raining.

And it is you who hold us all back. Those of us who have seen past the rain to see the sun streaming through the clouds. Those of us who can look past the horizon of rainclouds and see that the day will shine again will forever be hindered by you, sitting in your dank living room, stewing in your own filth.

We do not believe in your words, but you will not join us on the journey. Even if the rain is pouring, there is a path to the sunshine. But because the path is not covered with the right layer of brick, or because the wrong kind of people will be walking beside you, you'd rather we all just drown. And since we are bound together by the chains of kinship in this country, we will.

I'm sick of it. I have empathy for many types of people in this world, but I cannot feel pity for you anymore. I feel angry, hurt, and so very frustrated.

We have places to go and people to be in this world. You deserve to have your say, because this is the United States of America, but if what you say has not changed in the past few decades because your thinking has not updated either, then please. Just stop. You are only hurting all of us.